PART II — Continued from last Thursday’s post “The 5 stages of coping … with a failed experiment,” detailing the emotional roller coaster felt by a first-year PhD student after facing failure in the lab. That post ended on a high note: “With a little brushing up, you think, you might get to the bottom of your lab’s mission by the time you earn your degree four years from now.”
It’s been six years. …And now you are toying with the idea of quitting your PhD in favor of exploring Europe and South America.
Denial — When the test results come back negative, for the third experiment in a row, you confidently tell your undergraduate assistants that it is “no sweat,” because there’s “no doubt” that you will be graduating “this year.”- Anger — You bump into one of those undergrads while off campus, and in making conversation he casually asks you why you think the procedure failed again. You haven’t eaten or had your coffee yet, and so you suggest it might be his face. “What’s your major?” you ask, “Pissing people off?”
- Bargaining — You propose a wonderful idea … to yourself: There is a chance the committee won’t notice this research missing from my thesis. You vow to spend more time on your work if some greater being simply helps you sneak this one by them. “PLLLLEASE!” you say to the ceiling one day while studying at the lab, your peers now looking at you and weirded out. You tell yourself that there is so much more you can do for this world, but only if you are first set free. You turn to the young grad student next to you and, unsolicited, tell her, “I’m graduating this year.”
- Depression — “It’s no big deal. I can do this a fifth time,” you say. But you are not at the lab anymore. You’re at the bar and it’s a Monday night. And you have just ordered another cocktail.
- Acceptance — You bump into an old professor from your first year. She is happy to see you, and she asks all about your doctoral journey — even providing needed encouragement. “You are talented and strong,” she reminds you, “and to think, pretty soon you will be a doctor!” It actually leaves you feeling pretty good. You follow up with JoVE about a technique you’re in the works of publishing with your lab, and go to chat with your PI about how you can jazz up the filming process. With the filming date now scheduled, you say, “Coffee? Donuts? I’m buying!”
Special thanks to Michelle Kinahan, PhD., our science editor on this one!
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